"Coffee Girl"

Just before we left Lagos for our home visit, I started talking with friends about what kind of volunteer opportunities I should look into for the fall. Since this is the first time I have had both children in full time school and not worked, it is a bit daunting to think about how to effectively fill my time. I've had glimpses of the "stay-at-home" life before; I took a short maternity leave when K was born (just 3 months!) and then a longer Leave of Absence when we moved to Australia and C was just a newborn. It was an amazing time spent with lots of other stay-at-home moms in Melbourne but I only had a few days of childcare and E often worked late so I felt exhausted most of the time with a 2 year old and a baby - and on the other side of the planet.

Fast forward 5 years and here I am again - "staying at home". Only this time I don't have babies. I prefer to call it the "expat wife life". It sounds a bit more worldly - like I might actually be learning something if only by osmosis. The great thing about the expat community is there is no shortage of volunteer opportunities. Friends suggested being on the Executive Board at the kids' school, working at a local orphanage, teaching English to street children, helping in the school library, and being a "room mother" in the children's classrooms. This last option is an automatic NO in my book - it's a horrible and thankless task that puts you between your child's teacher and every helicopter parent this side of the Delta.

Coincidentally, a friend of mine approached me about taking over her role once she and her husband relocate. She runs the Company's "onboarding" program for newly assigned expat families. Most of the big companies have a volunteer-run group like this - a "welcome wagon" if you will. It's typically run by expat spouses who assist newcomers with questions about housing, schools, food and supplies; everyday life. The group interacts with HR regarding new families, then reaches out to them upon arrival, checking in periodically to answer questions about their adjustment and lend support. They also provide information for spouses who want to work or take advantage of the company's career development programs. There is a website, a newsletter, and lots of communications about nannies and drivers for hire, safety meetings, wellness programs, and social gatherings. The position is called the "Focal Point" and serves to be just that - a point of contact that expats living in Lagos can turn to for answers to the multitude of questions that arise when living overseas.

The program has an actual office at one of the compounds (pics here) so that the Focal Point can take advantage of the company's computer programs and have a place to meet with families when they come for their "preview trip" or when they first arrive. Part of the job is to keep open office hours to faciliate communication and be available for drop-in visits. There is even a library of travel books and kids' videos - most likely underutilized since the onset of kindles and DIY vacations but it adds a bit of flair to the office.

I am told the Focal Point (and the 2-3 other volunteers) used to host monthly "coffees" in the office or at someone's flat to welcome new families and discuss life in Lagos. Honestly, that is what I have been doing for several months now - hanging out with other "trailing spouses", having a coffee, talking about Lagos - where to eat, play, shop, get your hair done. This is probably my favorite topic of conversation as I am determined to unearth all the hard to find hidden gems in this town. In fact, I really enjoy helping the other "newbies" because I know all too well how hard it can be at the onset and even later when you think you are settled in.

Overall, it felt like a good fit and after a few weeks of shadowing the current volunteer, I agreed to take it on. My first real assignment is to select my new team as the other volunteers are relocating this fall as well. Even more enticing is a training "offsite" the Company wants me to attend in October. Apparently the offsite is in Dubai. Yes, Dubai.

Not too bad for a volunteer gig!

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